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It takes not but a glance to confuse a young woman of love. Young women are but fish in the sea looking for the right lure, and once one is found a young lady may be captured forever by loves embrace. The dainty and tidy dresses made of toughened burlaps were wrapped around most young women in Jiyyd, hiding their figure but keeping them warm in the frosted days. The horizon never melted, nothing around the Nars did. I was just a little fish in the grandest of seas. I remember my first sip of wine, crisp and tart to my tongue. Not what one would expect from a nobles cabinet, but certainly from a gypsies flask. Or more accurately a pirates, a drunken pirates. Garret, the first many I ever met outside of the Pass who treated me as a person, as a citizen of Jiyyd. Garret always under the cover of the Regal Whores roof, sitting on a barrel as he politely sipped a never-ending bottle of cheap, tart, wine. These were my favorite years of life. Sipping wine while watching the crowds travel in and out of the rain, silently mocking farmers as they tried to drag boars through the mud. It was my sixteenth snows-hail of life and I was a foolish girl enjoying the presence of a warm pirate and a bottle of gypsy juice, it was during this time when my life was forever changed as well. It was rare that a bedspread in the Regal Whore would be occupied by me for I spent most of my nights outside of the inn, huddling myself to sleep on my favorite bench. Tymora took pity on the side of the coin my fate called and, for this grant moment, I was let into the Regal Whores bedding areas and rested down upon a feather-filled cot by the loving arms of my drunken pirate. The candelabra chandelier above my bedspread had three extraordinarily colored waxed candles. They seemed to stretch the length of a Halflings reach and were dyed a shade of red so rare it would only be seen in Sune’s heart, I knew this to be my blessings. This was the night I would enter into womanhood atop the wine flooded phallus of a sea-going gentlemen by the name of Garret. The emotions racing through my body as we made love are still impossible to capture into words, for no word known by the Scribe is beautiful enough to glorify those sensations. Looking down at the sweaty rogue who showed me kindness I knew that the moment had to be forever immortalized. I closed my eyes and prayed to all of the gods whom would listen for something to capture the time, a bottle that would never be opened again but always radiate love. My wishes were not ignored by heavenly ears. No my body was blessed by a regent only a man can carry, and Lliira herself bound the fabrics of love, happiness and joy together to form the soul of my first daughter, Abigail. I did not know it at the time, I did not think pregnancy would be as it was. If I was to birth Garrets child then he would have not a choice but to love me for eternity, we would always be together. The Prince of Lies manipulates the hearts of all the young, weakening them to such a fragile state that love at first sight, and young love seems forever. It takes time and the blessings of Sune to refortify the heart and ready the children for real love. Sunes eyes were not upon me though, and my blessing was a curse. I wasn’t more than three moons into my pregnancy when Garret disappeared without a word. No one in Jiyyd knew where he was, no one in Norwick, no one in the Nars had seen him for more than a tenday. I was abandoned, only this time the fabrics of love inside me were also left to their own sanctuary. Oh how bitter the taste of abandonment and rejection on my palate. A revoking of warmth, the retirement of comfort, love withdraws herself from your soul and you’re left hollow. How I long for his touch still, for a sense of security about where he ran off to, whom he went to see. Depressing are the wants of the heart, they stress and strain your soul till the heart shatters in two. My heart was broken and I was thrown, pregnant, homeless, and alone back to where I started. Garret, my first, if you have been resting your eyes upon my in the shadows. If you have listened to me plead for your return but still remain with a bitten tongue, I wish for you to know the full extent to which you’re seed has ruined my life. I thought I was to blame for everyone I have ever hurt, but I know in the end all fault rests on your shoulders for abandoning me, teaching me what heartbreak was, and not helping me to parent Abigail. I pray for unending tortures in the afterlife for you and when my soul passes I will be at peace hearing your screams from the hells as I ascend to the heavens. Garret, you never saw your own daughter and you left me, pregnant, in Jiyyd. I dedicate all my rage on your behalf. These pages are supposed to be filled with the sweetest fruits of my heart to those I have harmed, but this page will be yours. A page filled with such hate that many of the local holy-warriors in Harrowdale will vomit at the glance of it. Words so harsh that the Zhentish would yelp for their mothers after reading. I want my viciousness to be apparent across this one, unique page, Garret. I want the Scribe to take my diary into the heavens and have it passed around to the Gods, the Celestials, the Devil, and the Demons of the outer planes. I want everyone in existence to see the pain which you have caused me by shattering the pieces of my fragile heart and leaving them for me to assemble again. I love you, Garret. You pushed me down a road I may never have traveled without your loss. My life would have been different if you stayed with me. If you kept me safe. If you gave me a home. If you loved your daughter. Thank you for being a horrible, heartless monster. It really benefited my career as a musician.

• Occupation: Student
• Education: In College
• College: Oakland University
• Sex: Male
• Age: 80

• Profile Views: 247
• Member Since: 09.06.07
• Last Seen: 08.19.08

rocks that arn't very heavy, construction paper, left handed scissors

mindless self indulgence, richee from switchee, tub ring

the secret of nihm, ferngully

lost, south park, drawn together, sarah silverman program

chuck palahniuk rocks my world